Saturday, August 3, 2013

Ladies, Dating is Still the most Dangerous Game

"A girl child just ain't safe in a family full of men." Sofia
said it best. The more appropriate thing would be to say that women are
not safe around men. Don't get me wrong, I know some wonderful men.
I married a pretty nice guy. So I am not a woman that hates men. I
enjoy their company. I always have. However, there are two
things you will never catch me doing with men... I will never be the lone female
in a group of men, and I won't be drinking around any man I don't know and even
if I do know him, I still may not imbibe.

Seriously It just isn't safe. According to RAINN (Rape
Abuse and and Incest National Network) 1 in six women has been raped, or been
through an attempted rape. One in six. Not 1 in 10 like our male
counterparts, but 1 in six. Women in the military are raped, college
students are raped, there is a whole trafficking ring to kidnap women and
children so that they can be raped for someone elses financial
gain. So that just leaves the rest of us, and I am willing to
bet that many of us have been raped, and decided to not report
it. We are being assaluted by family members, dates, and the serial rapists of the world.

I always admired the men in my life, and I had often heard older people talk about how "doggish" men could be, or how its not safe for a woman to do certain things around men. And as a young woman, I didn't really pay much attention. I was naive to the ways of predatory men. All of my interactions with men had been positive up till that point. The day that my eyes were opened to men is one that I will never, ever forget. There was a young man I went to school with who was the poster child for positve black manhood. He was the guy all the girls wanted to date, and the type of young man your parents would want you to marry. He had a girlfriend that he hadn't slept with him yet. She hung out with him, and got drunk that evening. She was extremely inebriated. She wasn't sleep she had passed out. He undressed her and had sex with her. I heard about it through the grapevine because the "guys" were talking about it and they thought it was funny. How they all were there and he told them what he was going to do and they just left him there to do it.

No one stopped to think of what effect if any this would have on the woman in question. She was drunk, she deserved it, he really didn't take it because she was his girlfriend.

I am not sure how she coped with what happened,but she felt like it was her fault.

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